“This little light of mine, I’m going to let it shine…”
It’s funny how that tune still runs so easily through my mind decades after learning it. It’s also funny how, as a girl, I envisioned a little yellow candle, and a basket, and the devil trying to “blow it out” every time I sang it. I knew the actions and liked to sing, so it was a comfortable part of my repertoire.
But, now, it’s like an anthem to come and die.
If the Light in me shines brightly, I am welcoming the forces of darkness to come and throttle me (and not, likely, with a wicker basket). In proclaiming my allegiance to the Father of Lights, I am fastening my name to part of His stellar constellation, and I am no longer hidden, I’m out there, exposed and raw, flickering with the fire of the Spirit.
All of a sudden, my life is being lived ‘out loud’; all of a sudden, I present a problem to the enemy.
My heart is aligned with the one, true God, but there is still a struggle with my flesh that not only likes the safety of conformity, but has been conditioned to desire ‘falling in line’ with the crowd since walking through that Kindergarten door. And, something about shining in the darkness is just so bold and uncomfortable to my flesh; it attracts attention and telescopes. It means not hiding from the world, from its opinions and prejudices, it means welcoming conflict and misunderstanding, and sometimes it means sticking out like a sore thumb (which is my increasing reality).
But this desire to move out of the shadows is good, because it means that Jesus is stronger in me; I’d rather risk life with Son than linger under baskets.